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Post by liquidpromise on Sept 3, 2006 22:35:05 GMT -6
Freshly picked white roses
Thorns attached to stems
Now stained red with blood
Per blow by blow across white satin skin
This is how you get off
This is what makes you smile
Dragging me kicking and screaming
Caressing my heartache for your tempest whiles
My eyes show no pain as you show no mercy
For it will only bring about your devilish grin
Pleasure be done with me
As you toss me into the briars patch
With thistles and thickets
Like trash for the vultures
To feast upon what is left of your ...
Carnal sins
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Post by DavidMc on Sept 4, 2006 15:05:55 GMT -6
I like the metaphor you've used here LP very appropriate methinks.
Love this line in particular. Very enjoyable read even though I am a guy LOL!
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Post by anirbas on Sept 4, 2006 17:04:37 GMT -6
My eyes show no pain as you show no mercy For it will only bring about your devilish grin Pleasure be done with me As you toss me into the briars patch ~fragmentation of LP verse. ~*~ poem left me speechless...resonating through my head like the echoes of a banged gong... thank you for sharing offerings with us, LP...got more? Nir.  |
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Post by liquidpromise on Sept 4, 2006 18:20:49 GMT -6
Sure I do, hundreds, lol.
I'll post some more soon.
Thanks guys, truly.
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Post by anirbas on Sept 4, 2006 22:23:36 GMT -6
Great! Then, you've no excuse for not bringing them on...Now that I know...*gigglegiggle*... |
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Post by liquidpromise on Sept 5, 2006 11:27:20 GMT -6
*Giggles~
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Post by shell on Sept 5, 2006 13:34:10 GMT -6
oh wow and *ouch ... "My eyes show no pain as you show no mercy" i so know that ... some people, no matter how you got entangled just do not deserve the revelation and satisfaction of private pain ... 'tis a bitter battle but i have been there. Your poetry always touches deeply, drags breath through the gravel of reality ... gorgeous writing!
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Post by liquidpromise on Sept 5, 2006 16:09:11 GMT -6
Thank you, hon
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Post by anirbas on Sept 5, 2006 23:12:42 GMT -6
Your welcome, Lauren. Might I say, I am equally stunned with and by, your writings? You've inspired me...As you did with your comments, in another thread, to write This...LOL...You bemused me, as poets oft do with one another, in the right atmosphere...And now, I think you've bemused me again...I feel a little something something coming on to share in your thread, inspired by your comments, and the rereading of your own offering..Hope you don't mind...Some of us poets, where we hail from, do that...And if you share a piece, in another poet's thread, then you can reprise it in one of your own, to keep up with it...I can't help it...You've bemuse me...Gotta tapdance across these keys...See what you've rattled up from the dust in my head...*giggles and grins to you, LP and crew*... ~*~ ~but one... this abandoned trestle... now overgrown, hidden within abundant thickets of spiny thistles... more flesh than mine, adorns these thorns... mounted like gobbeted gems in a natural grown crown... more flesh than mine, adorns these thorns... the past has more than one victim... of which, I am but one... ~Nir. |
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Post by liquidpromise on Sept 6, 2006 19:30:49 GMT -6
I like that, that is really cool and awesomely expressed, not to mention, very true, especially if you tie it into life's harsh realities such as abuse, that it doesn't just touch the one inflicted against but the many who choose to turn the other cheek because they don't wish to know it is true.
Excellent piece, my friend.
Now is not the time to let that dust settle, lol, I look forward to more of your musings.
Lauren
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Post by anirbas on Sept 9, 2006 18:17:16 GMT -6
hehe...you so funny...time to let the dust settle...LOL...cracked me up, you did... thanks and I look forward to more of your Laurenic musings...Sabrina |
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