Frenetic Fevered Frenzied Kineticism

[anirbas]

i.

It doesn't matter what I dream can be...
What counts is what is...
This...This...This
is my destiny...
This...This...
This is my reality...

Why fight it?
Why hide it, anymore?
I am the empty space
behind door number three...
Life is what it is...Reality check...Remember?

No hot to trot pole dancer, here...
Nothing so visually stimulating
as that degrading enough
feminine position...

I'm a naked stake dancer, baby...
Watch me twirl and undulate, without abate...
Furiously, mindlessly counterclockwise
cir...cir...circling the rusted iron rod
driven through the flesh, bone
and sinew of my left foot...

Blood dripping, running and spattering
the inner sanctum of my head, heart and spirit...
Praying for rain, the washing away of the invisible pain...
Hoping for a time out that never comes...
Wishing for an escape hatch that just isn't there...

As it doesn't matter, what I dream I can be...
What counts is what is...
This...This...This
is my destiny...
This...This...
This is my reality...

ii.

Everything about me
that can't be changed,
diluted to love doll status
sickens, twists the anger
of another...Not enough
that I'm a hostage
to the whims and wills
of this momentously
dreary lifetime...

You want a blood sacrifice...
The garnet slick sheen of my blood
spatters so turn you on...
My life was saved
so you could drain
the essence of me
one drop at a time...
Til nothing is left of me...
But, the useless vessel
this soul arrived in this dimension in...

iii.

Petty, tyrannical tirades...
Try my resistance...
To call down upon you...
Celestial, heavenly intervention with a vengance...
I fight not to break my personal oath...
I bite my lips til they bleed to keep from uttering
a death curse upon you...I vowed never again
to do such a thing, at least, in this lifetime...

For curses, like blessings,
are powerful, invisible entities
in their own right, that take on a life
of their very own once spoken...

I vowed, never again, to do such a thing...
Even if such an ending for one,
would mean the release and peace
of mind, for so many others...

Ah, hell...Why fight it anymore?
One of these days, you'll open door number three...
And there I'll be...Par to the course...
Counterclockwise cir...cir...circling...
The stake you drove through my foot...

No longer dreaming of freedom,
as I aimlessly run...run...run....

But, holding a waxen effigy
that looks a lot like you
in my angst clenched fist...
Relentlessly poking it
with a wicked hatpin...

Chant...Chant...Chanting...
As I poke...Poke...Poke...
Chant...Chant...Chanting...

Fuck off and die...
Poke...Poke...Poke...
Fuck off and die...
Poke...Poke...Poke...
Fuck off and die...
Poke...Poke...Poke...

The difference in you and me...
Is when you're blood starts to splatter the walls...
I'll take no pleasure in it...I shall instead, cry...
For everything that could have been...
And all that never was human in you...

~*~


























"Soy un parador...I'm a loser baby...So why doncha kill me?"

[soulfir3]

Powerful work . Totally *get* this one.. have you been listening in on the forgoings of my household in recent days ?

[anirbas]

nah, sweets...i've been channeling and pissing off the walking dead in my own
neck of the woods...LOL...thanks for liking it...but, I so wish for you...you didn't get it...
(((((((((S'fir))))))))))

[Sam]

Ahhhh.....are you for hire?

I have a job of importance
that needs some assistance
I have a foe out here
giving me too much resistance!!!

Sam

[anirbas]

ggglgggl...you so funny, Sammy...stop that...NOT!!!!!!!

[anirbas]

....oh...disclaimer...i don't practice witchcraft or voodoo...and i've as yet
to create a waxen doll of anyone and poke it with hatpins...but, it sure
was fun visualizing the doing of it...ggglgggl...

[glenn]

The difference in you and me...
Is when you're blood starts to splatter the walls...
I'll take no pleasure in it...I shall instead, cry...
For everything that could have been...
And all that never was human in you...

This is beautifully written.

[Sam]

Dang it all to heck!!!!

You had me going for a minute!!

Are you better?

Sammy

[anirbas]

Beautiful? Thank you, Glenn!

And thank you, Sams, for asking if I'm bettering...Took the last pill of this last course of antio-biotics earlier...Been feeling a wee bit better yesterday and today...Just weak as a kitten...
I tire easily...And the cold air rips me a new set of lungs, everytime I walk outside in the wind...But, today, I felt more like my "old" self than I have in several weeks...I started taking and picking Ivy up from school, myself--yesterday and today...I just don't push it...If I'm up for an hour, I'm down for three, after that, literally...So, still in bed, most of the twenty-four hours.
I get cold real easy now...Nothing like hiding under three comforters from the chill monster...hehe...That's the only way I seem to be able to get warm, these days. Dodging under the covers...Thankful to be feeling more human, but just not pushing it...I can't...
My body says you may want to write poetry, clean house and run around...But, I ain't having none of it...I'm going back to those comforters...Thanks for prayers of healing, Sammy...

Blessed be, ya'll and me!
Nir.

[dawness]

there you go, sabs.... knotting the gut and letting loose... i like this side of you. just raw and rabid!

"You want a blood sacrifice...
The garnet slick sheen of my blood
spatters so turn you on...
My life was saved
so you could drain
the essence of me
one drop at a time...
Til nothing is left of me...
But, the useless vessel
this soul arrived in this dimension in..."


no more fever,i'm sure! smashin gem!

[anirbas]

ggglgggl...yeah, DG...thaz me...raw and rabid...hehehehe...thanks a mill, sweets!
but tell me, darlin', have you seen my muzzle and straightjacket? i think...
i think...i think i'm in need of it...
before i lose my self control and take a big bite out of someone...
just to giggle maniacally while i watch their blood run...
and the dumb expression light up their faces,
when they realize what i've gone and done...
bitten a plug out of them, neat and ragged
as i pleased...and if they don't turn and run...
i'm about to do the same thing to them, again...

ggglggglgggl...

sometimes, i so understand, why good dogs go snap...snap...snapped...
and start tearing everyone about them to pieces til they're put down and out...

ggglggglgggl...ah, the world is safe...there's my muzzle and straightjacket...

blessed be, poetical folks! evernir.

[dawness]

hmmmm, blessed? after you " frenzied" me with this hitchcock thriller??? LOL

[anirbas]

ggglgggl...you silly sweet filly...
it's you and my galpals,
near and far,
make me giggle
willy nilly...
my guypals
make me guffaw...
hee-hehe-haw-haw...
hitchcock thriller?
really, killer?
I call this chiller
near reality...
catch ya later,
DG and peepers,
I'm off to don
my margarita
drinking slippers!
time to celebrate
without abate,
my Nirland
galpal
graduating
college
to become
a high school
teacher...
personally,
I think she must
have hit her head
falling down a bleacher...
I mean really...high schoolers?
she's jumping right into the trenches...
ggglgggl...really proud of this lady...
she went back to school, in her mid-thirties
and now officially has her summons
to lose her mind, at forty
running behind
teenyboppers,
head bangers,
posers and prancers,
rappers and rock and rollers...
rambling so off of here I'm ambling...
ya'll take care and yes, blessed be...
allow yourself to just blessed be...
Nir.