A Cutter’s Dirge

[brandnewmessiah]

Razor scars that fill my arms
Bleeding me is like being born
Wounds of sorrow opened from within
My mutilation breeds my scorn
I’m flattered by the precise way
You carve your passion into my skin
Shows how much you truly love me
Sharp is your heart and it cuts right in

I wear the face of a sad clown
With a painted smile I lie to myself
No make up can hide my alter ego
No heaven can keep me from this hell
My flesh is Braille for the blinded Father
My blood’s still warm on the lips of a Mother’s neglect
A happy family severed from the beginning
Childhood memories I now dissect

The loss of love has kept me aroused
Begging for the touch of my adored cold steel
With her tracing my wrists and leaving her kiss
The orgasm in this moment tells me it’s real
I can have death, I can have desire
The world that once was a lonely place
Has now welcomed me with open graves
Drowning in the dirt of it’s embrace

The incisions I hide remind me of dying
One for each day I was forgotten by all
The pain no longer hurts when the mind has gone numb
And you can’t feel the crash when you fall
You can say I’m tormented or turn a blind eye
You can laugh as if it’s a cry for attention
You can give me free therapy you’ve read in tabloid journals
Or you can join in and aid me in my wanting of perfection

It’s an addiction of glory of one man’s obsession
To be one with himself in a revered way
It’s a voice from the silence where I cowered screaming
Spoken are my words amongst the blood-spray
Here I am take me for granted
Viscously whip me with degradation and disdain
Whatever it takes for me to once be noticed
And instead of an expletive I’ll have a name

[wistfuldragon]

Wow...Bravo...

[anirbas]

Deep, deeper, deepest delving
[or should I say, slashing]
into the darker corners
of our minds...Excellent writing,
as always, Messiah. Anir.