Happiness

[dawness]

sure sha.. i miss our loving again dgroup!

david... happiness is oval???

[soulfir3]

i always figured happiness was kind of like a christmas cracker. sometimes you get a good bang.. other times you just get a down right dud

[dawness]

i totally agree with you , soul... could a positve attitude change the way we see life? hmmmmm.

[Sam]

I think it is more like:

some days you are the bug,
and some days you are the windshield.......

Think?

Sam

[dawness]

egg shaped... talking in riddles, david??? sha, do waht you want with the article... i miss our "loving again "dgroup!

[DavidMc]

For some like me ... Happiness is a complex equation,

David

[anirbas]

*Oh, my stars, Sammy...I just read this in an email and I thought of you and the other mommies in the Happiness thread.*


Some interesting things you find out when you have sons, like:

1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft.
house 4 inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a
crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not
strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and
a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint
can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a
few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a
long way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a
baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's
already too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even
though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-
year old Boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same
sentence.
12.) Super glue is forever.
13..) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you
still can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV
commercials show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys
do not like ovens.
20.) The fire department inAustin , TX has a 5-minute response
time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make
earthworms dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy..
24.) 80% of Women will pass this on to almost all of their
friends, with or without kids.
25.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
fluid.

[soulfir3]

rofl, thanks for the laugh Sabs - have been a crappy mood all day for no particular reason and this lifted my spirits considerably.. on a down note, i just had a male person ask me what ratio the clorox and brake fluid needs to be mixed .......

[dawness]

enjoyed the exchanges here... your post was great mood bender, sabs.
my best to you sha, david and and soul...

am reminded of the song from " the king and i".. happy, happy talking happy talk
talk about things you'd like to do..."

you better now, soul?

[soulfir3]

i don't know. i'm feeling so angry and frustrated with my life and events that are happening in it, which are out of my control. Bought myself a dammit dolly on friday and i fear it may have suffered a tortorous death by the end of the weekend

my biggest issue is that i am only ever good at dealing with issues when i'm face to face with the other person/s, and a lot of whats going on currently for matters of safety, sanity and my kids i can't deal with them as i'd like too. its putting me over the edge..

hope you're doing okay Dawn ( and the rest of the crew ).

[dawness]

you'll get out of it , soul.. went to a support group seminar which talked about inner care... when stressed or in a conflict, we were told to look inside ourselves and find out if the release of such emotions could be done physically, emotionally, spiritually or mentally.

on my notes:

spiritual---- prayer, meditation
physical--- dance, jog, kick ass ( kidding, LOL), exercise
mental--- research on something interesting, reading, journaling
emotional--- dumping on loving friends, talking to a counselor, having a "pity party", anger binge for an hour, then.... live again.

i'm in the emotional, so i'm dumping here... ooooh, humor helps too, LOL.

i'm pretty ok, soul.... hope you are too! cybersmile to all!

[DavidMc]

dawness said:

egg shaped... talking in riddles, david??? sha, do waht you want with the article... i miss our "loving again "dgroup!

"Happiness is egg shaped" Is an old advertising slogan by the
British Egg Marketing Board...

It was knocking around in my subconscious but couldn't remember where it came ... Shows these slogans do work LOL!!

[Sam]

Happiness Is a Choice
Furnish your mind with happy memories.


The 92-year-old, petite, well-poised, and proud lady, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o'clock, with her hair fashionably coiffed and makeup perfectly applied, even though she is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.

Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary.
After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready. As she maneuvered her walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of her tiny room, including the eyelet curtains that had been hung on her window.

"I love it," she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.

"Mrs. Jones, you haven't seen the room .... just wait."

"That doesn't have anything to do with it," she replied.

"Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn't depend on how the furniture is arranged... it's how I arrange my mind.

"I already decided to love it ... It's a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.

"Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open I'll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I've stored away ... just for this time in my life.

"Old age is like a bank account--you withdraw from it what you've put in."

So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.

[Sam]

"Happiness is a smile on a dog."

Sam

[DavidMc]

I agree that we 'think' ourselves into a state of mind

David

[dawness]

to let go... and forgive--- a happiness truism for me...

[soulfir3]

Sadly, easier said than done at times.

There are moments from my child hood and indeed early adult years where there were serious clashes with my mother, which have led to a complete break down of the relationship between us.
Not because I don't want to forgive her, but because without having answers too many of the questions - nothing can be resolved and for whatever her reasoning, my mother has no wish or desire too take part in the healing. So now I just kind of wade through it all, when I get angry with her or the whole situation, I write and when I'm feeling okay, I don't allow myself too think any more deeply into it at all

[Sam]

Try seeing your mother as just another woman. A human being with faults and failures just as we all have. We sometimes put our parents up on some kind of pedestal and expect them
to always know the right things and the correct answers and sometimes they just don't.....anymore than we do.

It is hard for a parent to admit their faults, sometimes....They are afraid of more rejection.

If she is unwilling to try to work with you, so be it. You try the best you can and you just have to let it go and go on with your own life!! If she wants to be in your life cycle she will
come to you. If not, perhaps your life cycle can complete itself without her in it. What a shame
and what a loss for her because you are such a wonderful unique gift to this world!!

Sam

[dawness]

yup, happiness is loving the self first and foremost.we are so unoque and beautiful, more than we care to admit... too bad for those who cannot acknowledge or honor this.

[Sam]

From "Positive Energy," by Judith Orloff, M.D.:

Certain people give off positive energy, others negative. It's the quality of someone's being, a measure of love with which they've led their lives. It also reflects the inner work they've done, their efforts to heal anger, hatred, or self-loathing, which poison us like toxic fumes. Energetically these linger, precluding joy from shining through. It's important to grasp, however, that once you undertake the process of healing, it changes the quality of even the negativity that remains. Don't be too hard on yourself-we're all works in progress.
SIGNS OF POSITIVE ENERGY IN PEOPLE
+ They exude an inviting sense of heart, compassion, and support.
+ You intuitively feel safe, relaxed, wanting to get closer.
+ They emanate a peaceful glow.
+ You feel better around them. Your energy and optimism increase.

SIGNS OF NEGATIVE ENERGY IN PEOPLE
+ You experience a sense of being demeaned, constricted, or attacked
+ You intuitively feel unsafe, tense, or on guard.
+ You sense prickly, off-putting vibes. You can't wait to get away from them.
+ Your energy starts to fizzle. You may feel beleaguered or ill.

I'm a big fan of being proactive in generating positive energy. The First Prescription's formula for success: Do whatever makes your inner light burn brighter. In other words, try to treat yourself and everyone else with love. It's a constant process of tuning in: finding people who support your spirit, trusting your gut-centered decisions to guide you. Then you won't end up in a relationship that looks right but feels wrong. Or miss the chance to meet a loving man or woman because he or she doesn't fit some preconception. When you're with trying people, aim for the high road; find common ground, rather than inflame negativity. The care with which you approach life is intuitively evident in your energy field. We can feel each other's love: that's the great attraction. Spread openheartedness around.

[soulfir3]

This was inscribed on a card sent to me by my " good will friend " through the women's friendship group I'm apart of.
Not sure who wrote it, but it described a lot of what is in my life atm.

Hope you enjoy it as well



What is your happiness?

happiness for some is a buck and a quarter,
happiness for other is a son or a daughter.
but what is happiness to you?
sure you can define,
if your feeling is such that you're no longer mine.
what is happiness...
and how can it be;
that there was once happiness,
now, no longer seen?
paradise we 'shared'
twas paradise to me,
now the paradise is just that of a flooded dream.
time is of the essance,
but time is what you need.
time to mend a broken heart,
or tear it at the seam.
words unspoken,
one side unheard,
all that your feeling,
is my number one concern.
you thoughts, your feelings this knowledge I yearn,
all that I've spoken, but now it's your turn.

[anirbas]

*I just opened this from my baby sis and it had me roflmao which brought me happiness...Which then in turn, made me think of this thread, and so I thought I'd bring it here, and share some happiness, Nirstyle...*t-he*...Whatever that is...LOL...Ivy says I have Nerdstyle, going on...ggglggglgggl...*

~*~



These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are
things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now
published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while
these exchanges were actually taking place.


ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
________________________________
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
_______________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh....
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Y es.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh?
____________________________________________

And the best for last

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

[rrw]

This may sound rather odd, but I don't think I care if I have a happy life... just as long as it's exciting. Poets very rarely write about happiness... usually it's about the desire for happiness... or the loss of it. And happy poems don't seem to stick with me for very long... usually I remember poems that are sad or explore the struggle of being alive... maybe that's it! I'm happiest when I'm not!

[anirbas]

LOL..."Maybe that's it! I'm happiest when I'm not!" You're to funny, shut up! jk

I propose an experiment...That will never happen, as it's isn't feasible, except in the metaphysical realm of the imagination...

Exciting over happiness? We switch lives for just twenty-four hours...

Guarantee, it'll make you decide happiness is better than exciting...LOL...

Now, having said that, the best of both worlds, would be to have an exciting
life blessed with happiness as well...And be able to rip out ten to twenty poems
a day or reams of prose standing on one's head...t-he...

Great to see you, Rob! Hope you're hand is bettering
and healing as quickly as possible!
But, don't overdo it. Nir.

[rrw]

Well, I probably AM happy... what ever that means... but am so busy doing things... I pay know attention. When I couldn't write, take a shower or ride my bike (which i still can't for another three weeks or so ) I DID feel sad... but now I'm back and things are just peachy...! Thanks for the concern about my hand... it is healing... slowly!

[dawness]

when i feel sorta down and out, i whistle this tiune.. ' don't wroory, be happy." rr , soul, sha , sabs and all, hope you know the song. smiley!

[Sam]

Wants versus Needs


by Nikki Willhite

www.allthingsfrugal.com

It is said that we spend the first half of our life accumulating possessions, and the second half giving them away. This is true for most people.

Why do we have to have so many things? Why do we buy things only to turn around and sell them for a fraction of the cost we paid for them at a garage sales?

We not only buy too much, but we often go into debt doing so. Self control when it comes to money is at an all time low. Our children seem to think that they should have everything that we have, ignoring the fact that some of our possessions have taken years to accumulate or to be able to afford.

Have you ever found yourself jealous of something someone else owns? How about a house, a car, clothes, jewelry, tools, appliances, furniture, a big screen television, computer, etc. etc. etc.

Do you have some preconceived notions that you just have to have a certain item (whether you need it or not) just because your family had it? When we were first married my husband use to stop and look at every Grandfather clock he saw. He said he’d always wanted one.

Yes, they are lovely. However, a simple wrist watch accomplishes the same task of telling you the time. If we had a LOT of money, then we would have perhaps purchased one. With our finances, it would be an unaffordable luxury.

All families are different. Some have one television, some have half a dozen. Same have many computers and cars. We all spend our money in different ways. Some people have to have the latest- whatever it is. Their clothes must be new, they consider their furniture old in 5 years, they replace their cars often.

If you want to live like this, you will have a lot of help! Every newspaper ad, magazine, billboard and television commercial will urge you to act on these impulses. If, however, you wish to live frugally, you will be walking alone.

When you pay cash for an item at the mall, you will be asked if you have a credit card and urged to apply for one with the promise of a discount on your purchase. Mail will be in your mailbox often urging you to take out credit cards and home equity loans. You will not find any role models on television either. You are on your own.

Only you can decide what is important for you to own. When you get older you realize that when you have so much, it is just more to worry about; things break and things are stolen. It is more work having to keep things clean. You learn when you are older to choose your things more carefully.

Decide what you need to make you comfortable. Learn to distinguish between your "wants" and your "needs". Don’t be so strict that you take all the fun out of life. Everyone should have a few things that they just love, even if they are not practical. Just try and develop simple tastes!

Learn to live with less. Learn to shun envy. Appreciate what you have.
If you have less, you will appreciate what you have more.

[soulfir3]

When ever I am at home on my own and feeling particuarly out of it, there's one movie which I love to drag out and watch which gives me a warm happy feeling One is Lean On Me ( Morgan Freeman )

[soulfir3]

Recipe For Happiness

2 Heaping cups of patience
1 Heart full of love
2 Hands full of generosity
Dash of laughter
1 Head full of understanding
Sprinkle generously with kindness
Add plenty of faith and mix well.
Spread over a period of a lifetime
And serve everyone you meet.

[Sam]

Today's DailyOM brought to you by:
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March 8, 2007

The Wisdom Of Surrender
Relying On Others

Most of us pride ourselves on our self-sufficiency. We like to be
responsible for taking care of ourselves and pulling our own weight in the
world. This is why it can be so challenging when we find ourselves in a
situation in which we have to rely on someone else. This can happen as
the result of an illness or an injury, or even in the case of a
positive change, such as the arrival of a newborn. At times like these, it is
essential that we let go of our feeling that we should be able to do it
all by ourselves and accept the help of others.

The first step is accepting the situation fully as it is. Too often we
make things worse either by trying to do more than we should or by
lapsing into feelings of uselessness. In both cases we run the risk of
actually prolonging our dependency. In addition, we miss a valuable
opportunity to practice acceptance and humility. The ego resists what is, so
when we move into acceptance we move into the deeper realm of the soul.
In needing others and allowing them to help us, we experience the full
realization that we are not on our own in the world. While this may
bring up feelings of vulnerability, a deep feeling of gratitude may also
emerge as we open to the experience of being helped. This realization
can enable us to be wiser in our service of others when we are called
upon to help.

It takes wisdom and strength to surrender to our own helplessness and
to accept that we, just like every other human being, have limitations.
The gifts of surrender are numerous. We discover humility, gratitude,
and a deepening understanding of the human experience that enables us to
be that much more compassionate and surrendered in the world.