So, What Else is New?

[anirbas]

If...If...If...
Ripping these stress
blasted and bleared eyes
from my convoluted cranium,
would take this away...
Take away the ravaging images
of these merciless betrayals,
manipulative machinations,
and heartless perfidy...

Then these dead eyes, wasted by your lies,
I would tear from my face, without hestiation...
If...If..If...It would take this away...
This view to a perceived kill,
you thought you'd executed
against me; and your family, indirectly...

Worst of all, as usual, you delivered
the coup de grace, unto yourself...
Furthering the detriment,
of your future...
As deadly,
as the look
in these opaque eyes
of mine staring,
back at you,
is your future...

If...If...If...
Ripping these stress
blasted and bleared eyes
from my convoluted cranium,
would take this away...
Take away the ravaging images
of these merciless betrayals,
manipulative machinations,
and heartless perfidy...

Then these eyes, wasted by your lies,
I would tear from my face, without hestiation...
If...If..If...It would take this away...

But, such self-infliction, though a nice dream
at this point in time, wouldn't cure
nor take this endlessly funneling
tornadic nightmare of pain
unleashed you've grown
into and become...

Though darkly pleasing...
This momentary visualization
of eye ripping, flitting
the darker corners
of my bleeding mind...

It would be as wasted
as your efforts, my son...
To threaten me with a malificent homecoming
of retributioning; replete with accusations
and blackmail, if I don't subjugate
myself, to your whim and will...

A plot that fell hard but flat...
As I danced on the slivered edges
of eggshells and the sharp heat of needles...
Danced to staunch the terminal
hemorrhaging, you'd worked
so hard, cypherically
to create, in the wake
of the reading...

I didn't sadomasochistically
squiggle this thick black
line in the nascent sand...
You did...You did my son...
This line, you've drawn...
But, now I have to deal with it...

So, what else is new?

~Sabrina.
9/2006

*the flip side of parenting*

[anirbas]

American Family Gothic

Do you really think I fear you?
You? Whom have broken
this charred heart,
where once,
none could
or had?

Neither,
lover nor husband,
ever hurt me as bad,
as the malechild I gave
birth to my son...Revel
in the power
you erroneously
think you've gained...
Wallow in it...Enjoy it...

For you are oh, so right...
You're mother is a valkyrie,
Though you used that word
to disgrace me, the last you used it...
You have done the worst to me,
that could be done, short
of my life being taken...
And I survived...
I survived...
This hollow,
hallway
of singular
pain,
without
an ounce
of gain...
I survived...

Not to eat you, alive...
Although I have visualized such...
And you certainly deserve as much...
I survived to walk away from you, too...
And this entire production
of American Family Gothic...

~Sabrina




*take no prisoners and eat the hostages*

[dawness]

merciless but full of ned for justice. great unloading, sabs! whew!

[anirbas]

thanks, DG...sometimes, nirland reality kidnaps my poeming and takes it hostage...ggglgggl...

[soulfir3]

Beg pardon for being so late in responding to this brilliant piece, Nir.

Love the layout and drawn, tortured feeling of emotion.

"Not to eat you, alive...
Although I have visualized such...
And you certainly deserve as much...
I survived to walk away from you, too..."



Got more ?

xx Soul

[anirbas]

Thank you, S'fir! It is nice to see you've drawn near here...ggglgggl...Perfect analogy
of the emotional tone of the poems, sweets. I felt drawn, quartered and tortured writing them...Got more? Honestly, I hope not...I hope not...I'd like to stop writing altogether,
in this ripped vein mode...LOL...Nir