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Post by glenn on Oct 17, 2006 12:42:04 GMT -6
dull cloudy day
rain falls
and the roses bloom
in clouds
of bright perfume
~~I think I got the syllable count right, but couldn't get the 3 line structure to match with the natural breaks in the words.
Oh well, maybe I'll call it a non-traditional haiku.
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Post by anirbas on Oct 17, 2006 20:59:52 GMT -6
Grrrrrreat to see you flipping the box over in your head, Glenn! Enjoyed reading what fell out...I'm only familiar with the 5-7-5 form in three lines...But, if you read through the synopsis of classical or traditional poeming, David provided us...I think it lists several different ways to write haiku... Or maybe I'm thinking of something I read somewhere else...Wonderful as usual, Glennic offering! Got more? Nir.  |
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Post by shell on Oct 18, 2006 6:45:28 GMT -6
Glenn - i love the images here! I am so pre-novice as far as Haiku goes but in terms of syllables i had a go at this .. something like:
dull days cloud rainfall
storm roses bloom bright perfume
colours mark dark hours
would get the syllables. Whether it gets the spirit of haiku in any of its forms, or even what you meant to start with i don't know LOL
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Post by glenn on Oct 18, 2006 10:19:21 GMT -6
I added a link to some more information about haiku in David's "glossary of forms" thread. Apparently, it is okay to experiment with line structure, especially in languages other than Japanese. Some limitations on subject material and use of metaphor exist, though.
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Post by DavidMc on Oct 18, 2006 11:31:09 GMT -6
Thanks Glenn for that ... I'm no expert on traditional poetic forms and any input is most welcome.
David
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Post by sasa on Jun 22, 2008 22:40:24 GMT -6
moon sprinkles
silver night shadows
moist
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