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Post by monicamack on Jun 4, 2007 11:46:05 GMT -6
Where is she sailing, the green ship of Summer?
Down the peridot gulf of July.
Water laps lovingly, exquisite fishes
twirl as my lady goes by.
Where is she gliding, the green ship of Summer?
Through August’s viridian sea.
Foam-covered waves and foam-colored sails
billow voluptuously.
Where is she destined, the green ship of Summer?
For the island October afar,
where gold is the purest in all of the world
and rubies the loveliest are.
Why is she fleeing, the green ship of Summer,
pale flash in the ebony straits?
Graceful and poised and assured of her triumph,
Autumn the pirate ship waits.
Who sings a dirge for the green ship of Summer
as proudly the pirate ship glides?
Only one gull from the isle of October
unheard in the thundering tides.
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Post by anirbas on Jun 4, 2007 13:39:58 GMT -6
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Post by pamela on Jun 4, 2007 18:02:32 GMT -6
This is gorgeous, Monica. Like a beautiful nursery rhyme that you just want to read aloud.
~P.
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Post by monicamack on Jun 4, 2007 18:06:18 GMT -6
Thank you so much, Nir. This is another "oldie" written some time ago. I posted it under the nature poems, and on the surface that's what it is. Sorry, it's one of a kind; I never wrote another one quite like that. But someday I'll try to do it. The only "real" things in it are Summer and Autumn; the ships are symbolic. That was the summer I noted the decline in my father's health, and I somehow felt worried and apprehensive about the future and, specifically, autumn, a season which is most beautiful and at the same time a little bit sinister. Sure enough, he died of a heart attack last week of October. But most people who have seen it accept it solely as a nature poem. Though it's a dismal fate for the poor green ship of summer, on the bright side, another green ship of summer usually (can't be sure with all this weird weather) comes sailing by in a year.
Thanks again, and best regards,
Monica
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Post by monicamack on Jun 4, 2007 18:16:30 GMT -6
This is gorgeous, Monica. Like a beautiful nursery rhyme that you just want to read aloud. ~P. Thank you so much, Pamela! I was baffled as to how I could reply to you, then decided to click this button, and it seems to be the right one. (Honestly, I am very awkward when it comes to clicking buttons, etc. am a clumsy navigator of the Internet.) I think I was being a bit melodramatic in this one, but I used to write a lot of stuff in this vein and destroyed practically all the rest when I decided to go contemporary and flopped. I have a very special affection for "The Green Ship of Summer," though, and I'm so glad you like it because -- and I can't say this about all the stuff I write -- I like it, too. And I take comfort in knowing that a happy green ship of summer will someday be sailing back our way. Thanks again! Best regards, Monica |
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Post by nimbusGLOW on Jun 4, 2007 18:23:41 GMT -6
'Monica~Miracle'
...
your poem is exceptional
...
for all its graceful beauty
within its elegant eloquence
...
the added bonus of it being in rhyme
brings further luster to its brilliance
...
I dare not attempt to choose a favorite stanza
for the whole is so complete as it unfolds
...
I adore the way it progresses through the months
and evolves through its delicate hues
...
you have a true devotee in me
and I'm thankful for the pleasure your poetry offers
...
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Post by monicamack on Jun 4, 2007 22:00:37 GMT -6
Dear nimbusGLOW:
Wow! What a magnificent compliment you have paid me! I'm overwhelmed and don't know what to say -- so I'll say "thank you" with about a thousand exclamation points.
I am very touched that you liked this poem, written at a difficult time in my life -- yes, in summer, but that wasn't a carefree summer. It came to me one day so easily, too -- I wasn't thinking about writing any poem; actually, I was job-hunting and had just taken a civil service exam and waiting for the results, so I was at loose ends. And I was worrying, too. That first line just suddenly popped into my head, and it took off from there. I still remember: I typed it on my Dad's old portable Royal manual typewriter (an antique), and I still have the original draft. It has barely been revised.
Seriously, your kind and very well expressed words are truly appreciated and will be cherished by me!!
Monica
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Post by nimbusGLOW on Jun 5, 2007 13:06:12 GMT -6
'Monica~Marvel'
...
You're so very welcome
for the sincere compliments.
And I thank you
for such a marvelous response.
Please tell me
that you have more for us.
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Post by monicamack on Jun 6, 2007 7:01:29 GMT -6
Dear nimbusGLOW: Thank you again! Unfortunately, "The Green Ship of Summer" is currently one of a kind. But who knows what the future may bring? (I'll try.)
Best regards,
Monica
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Post by DavidMc on Jun 7, 2007 1:31:23 GMT -6
This has a lovely lilting rhythm Monica and a strong traditional feel. I enjoyed reading this very much.
David
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Post by monicamack on Jun 7, 2007 7:08:43 GMT -6
Dear David:
Thank you so much for your kind words. (I'm pretty fond of this poem myself; it's one of my personal favorites, so your compliment is very welcome indeed!)
Best regards,
Monica
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