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Post by wistfuldragon on Dec 22, 2007 14:40:10 GMT -6
wow...can't say much more than that...just wow...
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Post by DavidMc on Dec 23, 2007 4:46:00 GMT -6
Fascinating insights Peg... I look forward to reading more! Little Bro
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Post by anirbas on Dec 26, 2007 19:12:52 GMT -6
Grabs a seat and settles down with a box of popcorn to await the next installment with bated breath...
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Post by DavidMc on Dec 28, 2007 8:27:35 GMT -6
Peg you have inspired me to dig out my Mother's recollections of wartime England, which in time I will post on the forum.
David
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Post by anirbas on Dec 31, 2007 18:02:31 GMT -6
*slipping by to say: TAG!!!!! YOU'RE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! had to run in and send my darling a happy new year's message...it's midnight, where my heart's ease is...ggglgggl...running to finish readying for this thing Ivy is dragging me to, I'm already regretting...so hard when you don't know anyone else...ARGH!!!!!!*
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Post by wistfuldragon on Jan 2, 2008 3:52:36 GMT -6
loves to you Lady with respect for all you've been through...hugs.....
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Post by wistfuldragon on Jan 20, 2008 15:26:23 GMT -6
hugs to you dear one...you will have your new life...free of those chains...
loves...M;}}
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Post by pegasus on Aug 11, 2009 22:02:21 GMT -6
this is amazing.....you've kept this for over 2yrs? or did you forget it was here and not delete it. seeing allmy words again was unbelievable. maybe i will start it up fom the day i sold the house and my experiences coming here, you think, hmmm......that is a possibility....i'll have to think about that yet. cant really decide yet. need to get misha home yet, so we can all have a family reunion, that mean you too little brother, no family reunion is any fun without you there, no, i'll take that back, its not fun alone, i missed all of you, or most of you. hmmm, its getting late, almost midnight, oh oh bewitching hr. good night loves, it is really good to be home amongst family, if i can get everyone all together again, are you listening sam, your also included in my homecoming, in all our homecomings, its time to take over the site again. love ya all peg
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Post by anirbas on Sept 2, 2011 22:13:20 GMT -6
Miz Mary Etta,
I always miss everyone that disappears as they journey into lives I cannot see...Miss your personalities and the voice(s) of your individual poems...Last we literally talked, though not here, you'd made the move and you and your man were making tentative gestures towards reconciliation. It's a wonderfully romantic story, imho (in my humble opionion. thought I might should write that out...wrote imho on some paperwork, at work the other day, and when I showed up for my next shift, my department super asked me why in the world I had written, "i'm a ho" on the notes, not once, but, twice...rofl...) Anyway, tickled pink to hear you two have become a couple, once more and again! Congratulations, my sweet! I know how much you were hoping it might be so...God, the universe, karma and kismet move in strange and mysterious ways, yes? Love seeing you here, again, sharing poems, reading poems, and milling about with the rest of our smallish poetical herd, here! Hugs! Nir.
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Post by vulture on Sept 27, 2011 22:40:18 GMT -6
the little dragon seems to have gone to ground and can nowhere be found. missed she is, as missed she shall always be, but, we do at least have the lovely poems of her sister to savor...(Hi Star!)
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Post by pegesus on Jul 8, 2013 0:10:57 GMT -6
what an interesting thing i did so many moons ago....erased a whole segment of my life because i became afraid of what people thougjt of me. that, unfortunatel is a part of who i am....afraid of what people think of me.
but you know....now that im all that i'm all that is left of who i was....i really have nothing to be afraid of. do i? Oh i do have my sons, and grandchildren, but i never really see them, only hear from them once in awhile. but who am i to be so afraid....i do have fred back in my life....we are all we have. our little cottage, our collie, our cantacerous maine coon who always has to be near us but is always fighting us when he wants to...what he doesn't realize is the now that he wont let me brush him without becoming a wild animal, i got to call the vet and see of they and anethisize him and shave all the matted areas off his and somehow get him to accept me brushing him so he doesnt mat up again. well, i cant make up for lost words, but i can just ramble on and bore you all till you all cry uncle.....but sometimes i just need to ramble on and you have been selected by me to be my captured audience. i guess im going to bed now and sleep on that, see what mischief i can get myself into tomorrow. nite all
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Post by anirbas on Jul 8, 2013 20:59:21 GMT -6
Erased something? Not a problem. Just grab a pencil and sketch that part again... Again, great and good to see you amongst our select group, again. You have been missed here... And, you have missed alot, as well...Our newer members and their fab works, for instance...Heartfelt and Phantasm... Amy is still here...Moseley moses in, every so often...lol...Haven't seen Glenn in a month of Sundays...But, certain he will wander out of the mountains and near a library and we will hear from him, too...haha... Bring mischief...Bring poetry if you're feeling the muse...Bring yourself and simply read, comment and share your light with us, one and all... Sheesh...I am loopylegged and rolling like a freight train right now...Gigglegiggle...And so, far, not lost much hair if any, that I can tell...Decided if I do, I shall buy me several wigs, in various colors...One day, I will show up at work as a blonde...The next, a redhead...The day after that...A brunette...Then...I shall show up with raven tresses...And a pink one and a purple one, too... Rambling, again...Shutting up...Probably going to slip out and "jump" onto 'Battlestar Galactica' the newer version, that is, and get my sci-fi on watching episodes with The Hubs. Take care of you for me and come on back home anytime you want. You'll love Heart and her work. And Phantasm has brought us a nice, strong shot of youngblood to spice the group up. You may remember him...He's been here before, too... Gosh, I'm yakking so much, I'm even getting on my own nerves...hehe... Good evening and all that rot, love!
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Post by pegesus on Aug 10, 2013 17:26:36 GMT -6
well, this will really get me into some hot water....I'm at the ends of my ropes....my faith and pride in my country now fades rapidly. we used to be a country of freedoms, a country where we could believe as we chose or not to and still be accepted for who we were as a people.....if something was wrong and out of wack, we were up in arms about it and changed it, now i only see talk and little action except to hear complaints while another atrocity against the people occurs. I know people have mixed feelings about abortions, and that is acceptable, but are they aware of why abortion clinics came about in the first place? They were created as a safe place go and to stop back street abortionist from killing teen aged girls amid women who had no place to go to end an unwanted pregnancy. It is understood that there are those who disapprove of the practice, but if you disapprove of it stay away from it, but don't force your opinions on others. discussions is one thing, forcing is another...that is not your right. we no longer live in the age of the crusade's. People have the right to free choice, they don't have the right to force those choices down anothers throat if they don't want it. The tea party is no different than the brown shirts were in Germany before WWII. What happened to the idea of separation of the church and state? We have too many different religions to force one down everyone elses throat. Do I sound pissed yet? I have a lot of anger and deep concerns still demanding to be released. !) I'm a Senior on SS ONLY!!!! and I'm still below $1,000. 2) I resent being told my SS check is a benefit, I have paid into that since i was 18.....isn't that what you do with a retirement program? 3) What happened the the will of the people? If we feel it is safer to have guns stopped from getting into the wrong hands, what is wrong with that? Oh .....that's right....rifleman's association wouldn't have any buyers....and our people need assault weapons to kill each other.....I guess I'll stay indoors and keep my doors locked. 4) since when does the state legislation have the authority to make decisions for the people against their wishes? Oh I could keep going on and on about all the slimy things that have taken place since the Republican have been taken over by the tea party....they have caused so much shame to our country that it actually disgust me ....I have never been so ashamed of my country than i am now....all the good people are being stepped on and treated as slime.....we don't run our country anymore.....crooked politics do......I think I just heard George Washington and Abraham Lincoln roll over in their graves.....These are the saddest days of my life and suddenly I feel so ashamed and sad watching my country fall apart at the seams. there, i spoke my mind and i hope people realize i'm not forcing them on you, i'm just voicing my concerns for a country i was born in, a country i served for over 10 years, and a country i use to be proud of.....now i'm just not so sure of anymore.
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Post by anirbas on Aug 13, 2013 21:03:37 GMT -6
I believe many of us, have reached a point, regardless of our age, when we are beginning to second guess the choices of our so called government. Your rant and rave is both, timely and timeless, my dear friend. Good to see you hanging out, darlin'!
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Post by phantasm on Oct 30, 2013 17:04:22 GMT -6
I have only just now seen this thread.
I understand that you feel frustrated at life and the government and the world. I sometimes feel that way too. And I don't know what you're facing in your personal life. I just wanted to say, don't give up on yourself. It is still possible to do what you love on this forum. I hope you see this message soon.
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Post by anirbas on Nov 10, 2013 9:49:15 GMT -6
(((((MaryMaryMary)))))
I do not know what has occurred with your son to make you feel this way. I only know, I have been here. I have so been here. And if we were in the same room, I would hug you tight, and fill your head with the "it's all going to be okay and this to shall pass" cliches.
I cannot tell you what to do or not to disown your child. I don't know what your particular circumstances are. I only know, one may speak the words of disownment, but, one can never truly disown ones child, no matter what has transpired. In your head, your heart, your soul, no matter what your mouth says, your child, will always be your baby.
What I do know, is I found myself here, in your shoes, in the years of 2004 through 2008, with my own son. I was so filled with hurt, anger, confusion and bitterness all I could write were dark poems of angst. Some one has to write those poems. And they can only be written by those of us truly in the threnches of emotional despair.
So, pour it all into poetry. Write it out of your soul...It does help...Eventually...Not right off the bat...Maybe, not for a long time...
I can't think what would cause you to disown your son...I only know, I've felt that...But, found it can't be done...Took me awhile to figure that out though...So, you may need your time to be mad at him as badly as I needed my time to be mad at him, my son, too...
My son leaves the penitentiary system, somewhere betwixt and between, December 2013 and March 2014. I have not seen him, since the year of 2007. As I could neither afford to travel, nor handle the pain of traveling for the past five years, to where he was incarcerated.
The road ahead of you and your son and his father, is not an easy one. But, it is the road you are on, now, none the less. Feel your pain. Feel your anger. Grieve for what's been lost, even if it's only the faith you had in your child...That's a lot to lose...I know.
(((((MaryMaryMary)))))
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Post by pegesus on Nov 14, 2013 21:37:49 GMT -6
thank you phantasm, for your kind words and encouragements, they really meant something to me.
oh Nir, my heart has broken, my trust has fled, my fears are running rampant in my head. I just feel so lost and helpless. I know I spoke of banishment, and you are right about always carrying my son close to my heart, but the disappointment and shame he has caused me and the whole family is unbearable and unforgivable. I still have no words to share, no desire to write poetry, the words just arrant there. Maybe in time they will appear again, I just dont know how they will present themselves. Most of the poems I have written in the past had some kind of message to therm.....but now I just dont know how they will bee and i really dont care. I dont know how long it will take me to heal, if ever. I knew you would understand, and now I understand my own life's experience to prepare me for this...but it is still so hard. I dont even know how long i will stay in my cave....even trying to mingle takes a great deal of effort for me. I just dont want to leave the safety of my own little world....I am hiding again from the world....it keeps causing me pain, Im getting so tired of the pain....will it ever go away....will it ever give me some moments of peace. This is all I can write now, but your words are a god send for me....you have given me courage again to try......Thank You, from the bottom of my Heart
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Post by anirbas on Nov 14, 2013 23:20:13 GMT -6
(((((MaryEtta)))))
Do as you must, while you must... Grieve, heal, deal... This too, shall pass... Hang in there... Until it does...
(((((MaryEtta)))))
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Post by pegesus on Nov 16, 2013 15:11:39 GMT -6
I find myself needing to write my words as I work through this trauma of mine.
growing up is such a hard process to go through. we make so many mistakes as we travel down that road and some of them we miss. i know these mistakes are part of the lessons of life and i have tried to analyze them as i could to try and understand what i was meant to learn. i know that we all make mistakes and need understanding to get through them, but sometimes we fail to see, we fail to turn to others for advice and we fail to learn. they say that when you ask for advice it is not to take that advice verbatum but to analyze them,, dissect them, and use only what actually applies to you. There are times though, when someone else's mistakes are serious enough to affect many people at once. how are we to deal with those, how are we to learn from them, are we to be part of the persons lesson who generated the mistake,or is there a part of the lesson that is only theirs and part that is only for the victims and family? why are lessons sometimes so painful for so many people at once? i find myself then turning to look at other events of serious consequence where death has taken place and i begin to wonder what each type of crimes and trauma we all sometimes have to deal with and what lessons were so critical as to generate such a traumatic result. right now i dont have any answers for that, but that is where my mind has reached so far. what is this lesson im to learn that i havent learned so far, what lesson does the father have to learn, and the lessons of the children involved and the lesson of the son who caused so much pain to all....what is his lesson and will he ever learn? these are all questions that need to be asked and answered. i also find myself realizing that you never stop having lessons......you will have them up to the time of death, and your the only one who knows what your lesson is and what the answer is to it. you can share them, but that doesnt mean the one shared with will understand because maybe its not for them to learn from. im just glad that not all our lessons are painful or traumatic, but we still have to learn them, they make better people of ourselves if we listen to them....sadly not all even bother to know them. okay.....i've done enough for today, my poor brain is in overdrive and i dont want to burn it out. thanks for listening to me rattle on while i try to make sense of this, but i do see some attempts from the remaining family drawing together and sheltering each other (at least that is what i hope im seeing)
love ya, mary etta
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Post by anirbas on Nov 20, 2013 16:40:42 GMT -6
(((((MaryEtta)))))
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Post by pegesus on Dec 4, 2013 14:16:03 GMT -6
Just wanted to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. We will be having two of our granddaughters here for Christmas....I only hope we can ease some of the trauma inflicted on one of them and the confusion on the other. My youngest has the other two children staying with him till the courts decide what will be the situations for them. We are hoping for at least the two middle girls and my son takes the oldest girl and the youngest boy. The oldest girl is holding up under the circumstances and she will be graduating from high school next year and off to college, so maybe that will be the best for her, so the courts only have to make their decisions on the three remaining children. I am still in shock over this but I'm hoping the new year will be more settling for my babies and who knows, we may get all three.....who would have thought what fate had in store for us. Blessings to all Love and Hugs Mary Etta
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Post by anirbas on Dec 10, 2013 18:39:58 GMT -6
It is good to hear you sounding more upbeat and proactive. I refuse to say time heals all wounds, because it does not. But, time does allow us to catch our breath between sobs and to breathe without screaming, again...Love you. Stay strong. Your grandchildren need you. Sabrina.
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Post by anirbas on Dec 29, 2013 18:39:31 GMT -6
Hope all is well as can be in your neck of the woods, sweet...I trust you've had a good Christmas, with the kids, inspite of the pall hanging over your spirit(s) at this moment.
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